Sick Relative and Sick Leave Benefits

Q: I recently had to take some sick days off to care for my brother who is suffering from HIV. I really don't want to have to explain to HR why I am taking these days off. They keep asking my reason for taking the days off. I have said that a family member is very sick. They have asked which family member and to "please describe the nature of the illness." Is this legal? Do I have to disclose? Very few people know about his illness and there is still a stigma associated with HIV whether we want to admit to it or not. 

A: You are an incredibly supportive sibling. In order to take approved “sick time” (whether paid or unpaid) off from work, you need to provide your employer with enough information for your employer to determine that you are using the leave for the purposes intended. You are wise, however, to protect sensitive medical information.

Jeff Dretler, an employment attorney from Fisher & Phillips, explains: "Under the new Massachusetts Earned Sick Time Law, effective July 1, 2015, most employees can use accrued sick time to care for an 'immediate family member' suffering from a 'medical condition that requires home care, professional medical diagnosis or care, or preventative medical care.' Under the law though, an immediate family member does not include a sibling which is why your employer needs more information about the familial relationship. Similarly, under the federal Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA), which applies to employers with 50 or more employees, an employee seeking time off to care for a seriously ill family member (which like Massachusetts law does not include siblings) must describe the type of care which the employee plans to provide for the family member."

An employer may ask about the “nature of the illness” to better understand what benefits you may apply. Dretler further explains, "Relevant facts may include whether the patient is hospitalized, the type of care the patient will require, the expected duration of care, but need not necessarily include the diagnosis. In most circumstances, it will not be necessary for you to disclose to your employer the actual diagnosis of the person for whom you are caring (e.g., HIV). An employer who demands from the employee more information than is necessary, to determine the employee’s right to the leave, could very well be in violation of state or federal laws, including those which protect employee privacy."

I would recommend asking specifically what your employer is seeking. Is there a form that they could provide? Many physicians have navigated similar issues and have experience with sharing what is truly required. If you are further pressed for information, you may want to contact an attorney.

Pattie Hunt Sinacole is a human resources expert and works for First Beacon Group in Hopkinton, an HR consulting firm. She contributes weekly to Boston.com Jobs and the Boston Sunday Globe Money & Careers section.

Referring A Son Can Get Messy

Q: I recently referred my son to a position within my company. The position is working for one of my three supervisors. I am a director at a large medical device company and we have had a horrible time recruiting for this one role. My son would be ideal! I was told by HR that he could not work within my area of responsibility even though he is not reporting to me. Is this a common policy? I have never heard of such a policy. We are facing recruitment challenges so I thought this would be the answer to our prayers.

A: Many companies have policies which provide guidelines for employees, including an "employment of relatives" policy. Many of the policies prohibit immediate relatives from working too closely together. Some policies will discourage immediate relatives from working within the same department. While other policies will prohibit an employee from being related to a senior manager or a board member. Sometimes there are exceptions to these rules, like summer interns or seasonal employees. The intent of the policy is to minimize favoritism or even the perception of favoritism.

In your situation, you could be placing your supervisor in an awkward situation. What if your supervisor has to discipline your son? Or what if your supervisor thinks your son is outstanding and she wants to promote him? Will others assume it is because of the familial relationship? Or what is your son shares information with you that he shouldn't? It becomes a messy challenge.

There are reasons why companies implement such policies. Most companies want their organizations to be run in the best interest of the company. Companies are hoping that employees will make decisions based on what is best for the company and sometimes familial relationship can interfere with that impartiality.

Although your recruitment is a challenge for your company, I would honor your company's policy and refrain from referring family members.

Pattie Hunt Sinacole is a human resources expert and works for First Beacon Group in Hopkinton, an HR consulting firm. She contributes weekly to Boston.com Jobs and the Boston Sunday Globe Money & Careers section. 

Time Off for Heart Condition Might Qualify Employee for FMLA

Q: I recently had a serious heart problem. I was hospitalized, released and then re-admitted. I think I am now ready to resume full-time work. I work as a Director at a large biotech firm. I am worried about job security as I work for a man who is a Type A and does not like when anyone is out sick. How can I protect myself?

A: I am sorry that you had a serious health issue. It sounds like it was frightening. I can share a few recommendations.

First, make sure that you are physically ready to return to a full-time schedule. Discuss the demands of your job with your physician. You will want to make sure that you are ready to return so you don't have another relapse. Your employer will likely request a note from your physician ensuring that you are physically able to fulfill the demands of your job. Your physician may request a gradual re-entry back to work. I have noticed many physicians request one week of a part-time schedule before resuming a full-time schedule.

If you work at a large firm, you may be protected by the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA). FMLA is a federal law which provides job-protected leave for certain conditions to eligible employees. One of the conditions is an employee's own serious health condition. Your heart problem, and related hospitalization, likely qualify as a serious health condition. To be eligible for a FMLA leave, your employer must employee 50 or more workers. Additionally, you must have worked for at least 12 months for your employer and you must have worked at least 1250 hours in the 12 months prior to your heart condition. You also must have worked at a location where your employer has 50 employees within 75 miles of that work site. For more information about FMLA, review http://www.dol.gov/whd/regs/compliance/whdfs28.pdf to better understand your rights and your employer's obligations.

Your manager's attitude is disappointing. There are challenges in all of our lives which necessitate time off from work. One way to mitigate his concerns is to develop a written update upon your return. This will reduce your manager's concerns about anything "slipping through the cracks." Best wishes for your continued recovery!

Pattie Hunt Sinacole is a human resources expert and works for First Beacon Group in Hopkinton, an HR consulting firm. She contributes weekly to Boston.com Jobs and the Boston Sunday Globe Money & Careers section.

Manager Leaves Employee

Q: I was hired late last year at a mid-sized company. I enjoy my job. I was hired by a former manager who had started working at my current employer last summer, a few months before me. I loved working for this woman in the past. We just clicked. At this company, it has been more of the same. We work really well together. I found out last week she is leaving our company. She lured me away from my old company. I am a bit ticked off but don't know how to express it. How should I approach her?

A: How wonderful that you found a strong manager and were able to work with this woman twice. Companies change, employees change, customers change and how we conduct business changes. Change is inevitable. Change can be hard. You may never know why your manager is leaving. Perhaps she was asked to resign? Maybe she found a more challenging role? Or her job was being eliminated? Maybe she is moving across country?

Employees and managers have to make the best decisions for themselves when considering career options. There are many variables as to why people choose to changes jobs from location to a better opportunity.

My guess is that when you accepted the role at your current company, your manager did not promise she would remain employed there indefinitely. Change is inevitable.

Take the high road. Avoid approaching her in an annoyed way. Instead, ask her about her next career move and if you can remain in contact and use her as a professional reference.

PS - Happy Labor Day! Do you know when the first Labor Day was celebrated? Visit this link for more information on the history of Labor Day. http://www.dol.gov/laborday/history.htm

Pattie Hunt Sinacole is a human resources expert and works for First Beacon Group in Hopkinton, an HR consulting firm. She contributes weekly to Boston.com Jobs and the Boston Sunday Globe Money & Careers section.